Confessions of a trigger happy addict!
Had you asked me if I had an addiction say about a little over a year ago and I’d tell you absolutely no. To be honest it would perhaps have offended me that you’d even think so (no pun intended!). But ask me today and I have to confess and honestly tell you ‘YES I am an addict’. I have a strong addiction and I am unsure if I really want to rid it. My family tells me I've changed and my friends ask me what’s keeping me busy but how do I articulate that it’s because I am under the influence of euphoria caused by feeding my addiction.
I feel a constant need to invest my every minute of the day in my addiction and almost in a ridiculously funny way causing myself to refrain from indulging in anything but just that. Fortunately that this addiction of mine is lifting my spirits and keeping me in good stead mentally, artistically and creatively; contrary to what most addictions bring about. In fact even a day without entertaining my addictive desires will leave me feeling extremely antsy. But pamper it and it’s easy to get overwhelmed by the emotions and thrill of feeling right on top of the world.
YES!!! I am an ADDICT, a Trigger happy addict, a photographer who simply loves his job way too much to take a break even for a day. I do it for a living, I do it on my breaks, on vacations and even on my days off, so really what does that make me? I’d say it makes me a photography addict. For me photography isn’t a mundane activity nor does it feel like a chore, if anything I experience absolute chaste gratification every time I hold my camera up to my eyes. In more ways than one I feel blessed because I’m addicted to my job and enjoy it immensely.
If we want we can easily find enough legitimate reasons to avoid work, but for me it’s exactly the opposite as I look for more ways to spend time with my art and addiction-Photography. I feel like the sky is the limit and there is just about no way I can run out of subjects to create my picture. While client projects restrict me to applying creativity to predetermined subjects, my personal projects take me on an unending journey of exploration through my lens. My camera is growing into me and is becoming an extension of me.
But I don’t need help because I am a Trigger happy ADDICT! So I conclude based on my experience that not all addictions are bad or have negative effects. The word itself doesn’t necessarily need to be detrimental. In my case I have a very healthy addiction and I simply love it. Photography has made me a better human being who values the beauty in the little things we see around us. I am perpetually intrigued by the realms of possibilities we can reach as photographers and if anything it makes me ever so ecstatic to have found bliss in my job and my art form.
Bio-blog: Kiran Bernard Kutinha
